Blog
13
May
2010
Mr Bluesky Thinking
Written by Imogen
I lay awake staring at a patch of light on my ceiling last night. From 22:30 to 00:48 I argued with people in my vivid thoughts, half dreams and long hidden memory.
Arguments which haven’t happened, which make me panic, which make me mildly smug and the all important Final Argument which, if it did happen, would at least give me the excuse I want to leave.
But I know if the Final Argument ever were to happen I’d be mute. Face to face I’d pull out my highly trained blank face – drama degrees count for a lot in real life. On the phone I’d stay silent. I think that actually winds people up more if they don’t get their reaction. Sticky marble silence. Anger stays stunted, unfed and dies a miserable death in the corner of the office.
Yesterday I wrote to my all time favourite theatre company. A begging letter. Yes I am suddenly desperate. The last time I did a mail out of plays and stories was four years ago and since then I have coasted on good luck and breaks which has got me somewhere in building a portfolio but nowhere in building a bank account and getting me out of my blue cubicle.
So today I am starting the mail out again. This is all costing me sleep and something has to change.
Wish me luck.
Luck xxx (and THANK GOD!)
Comment by Anna on May 13, 2010 at 10:16 am
I’m sending luck too. x
Comment by Steph on May 13, 2010 at 10:41 am
Evocative of Jean-Paul Sartre . . .
Comment by James Horsman on May 13, 2010 at 12:16 pm
You should write songs
Comment by Lauren on May 13, 2010 at 5:31 pm